Written by Cat Hartwell-Veale, BuDS Reach4Work Personal Development Advisor
On December 12, 2023, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I remember the day so clearly: I had an appointment with a psychiatrist to talk about why I was struggling with my moods, finding stressors challenging, and afraid of damaging my relationships with people I love. After an hour speaking with a team of four strangers, I came away with a diagnosis. I started medication immediately and was told to report back in a few weeks to see how I was getting on.
Three months later, I was made redundant from my job.
The added stress of losing an income stream amid a cost-of-living crisis pushed me into my own crisis. This sparked a long episode of depression and anxiety, as I struggled to come to terms with my new label and what it means when applying for jobs.
The stigma surrounding bipolar disorder is strong: I feel some shame even writing about it now. I know for me it’s genetics, mixed with some adverse childhood events and bereavements, all culminating in a brain chemistry that makes life really tricky. But shaking the stigma is a long road.
Another long road is job searching! And how could I come to terms with a new (somewhat scary) diagnosis whilst putting all my best qualities on an application to be judged by recruiters and hiring managers?
After two months of rejection after rejection, I felt defeated. I have a master’s degree in child development and worked for a mental health charity for two years. Friends and family said I would have no trouble getting a job. I got stuck in a loop: is it the job market? Is it me? Why is this so difficult?
It’s so hard to know: does having bipolar disorder make me an undesirable candidate? Should I even state I have a mental health disorder on the applications? Does ticking that box suddenly make me as an applicant not as enticing?
So when I scored an interview with BuDS for their Reach4Work Personal Development Advisor role, I was ecstatic! I had done some research before applying for the role and felt so seen and understood. This was an organisation led BY disabled people FOR disabled people! I wasn’t ashamed of my disability in that interview, I had no reason to be. This was an organisation that knew how I might struggle, knew the stigma I was facing, and welcomed me with open arms and compassionate ears. I could articulate my fears about the job, how my disability may impact my work, and what accommodations could be put it place to help support me so I could support others.
I’ve not been with BuDS for very long. But the impact it has had on me is great. I’ve been able to use my skills to help people just like me: people who struggle in the job market, jumping through a million hoops to fill out an application. I’ve worked with the Reach4Work participants doing CV reviews, making mock interview presentations, and helping participants find the right path for them, either in education or employment. The Reach4Work team is all about helping disabled people realise their potential and reach their goals. And that’s exactly what it did for me.
If Cat has inspired you to find out more about our Reach4Work project, and how it could help you move closer to work, please click the button to learn more.
Disclaimer: this is a personal blog by a BuDS member. The views expressed are personal, and don’t necessarily represent those of BuDS or our Trustees.